The best pick-up line I ever experienced was in college (so many years ago!). I was at a party and I knew the guy who was throwing the party pretty well since we’d been flirting back and forth for several weeks. He invited me to it and I just “knew” that this was the night when we would move beyond the friendship stage. The party was great and it stretched into the wee hours of the morning and as people left, I stayed behind but the guy didn’t approach me or make a move. He  was pretty shy and quiet but I figured I’d read his signals wrong and I got ready to leave but his loudmouth roommate got me to stay as more and more people left.

 I finally got fed up and I made my move to leave when the “shy guy” chased me out into the hallway and asked if I had enjoyed the party. I was a little irritated and I let him know that I didn't understand why he’d invited me to a party and then practically ignored me all night. He stepped forward and grabbed my hand, his cheeks red from his blush as he told me that he’d thrown the party just for me, the sole purpose was to get up the nerve to kiss me goodnight.

 He leaned over and laid a kiss on me that made my toes curl. It was fabulous and we dated for a while after that.


The Prince's Runaway Lover

Crown Prince Nicholas Lytton was never supposed to be ruler of Callanos. He was the “spare to the heir,” pursuing a decadent life of the rich and royal—extreme sports, physical pleasures, and glorious irresponsibility. Until his brother died. Now Nick is to be coronated king, and no one believes he's ready.

The best way to secure his crown is to do the unthinkable…find a queen.

While Isabel Reynolds works in the palace gardens, she has no desire to draw the attention of the way-too-flirty, would-be king. For she's not the woman everyone thinks she is. Even if she wanted—or was tempted by—the promise of love, it would only end in disaster. Because while Isabel may be able to catch a king, her secrets would only destroy him…

I was a nerd in High School. I attended a math-and-science boarding school in SC, and was surrounded (finally!) by a bunch of other nerds (the story of how I ended up a historian is long and boring, so I’ll skip it).
Now, an author claiming to be a nerd is almost expected, what with geek-chic being a legit style choice these days. But I think I can back up my assertion with some examples.
For instance, we had a student-led pep-band for our basketball games, and one of our favorite chants went:


I had a suitemate who took the SATs nine times because she kept getting a 1590 out of 1600, and that was unacceptable. We had a cheerleading squad—also student-run—that we called the Proactive Synergy Coordinating Squad (PASCs), because we were far too full of ourselves to be mere “cheerleaders.” We souped-up our TI-81 calculators. We started our own cheese appreciation club for crying out loud.

So you’ll have to grant that we were nerdier than most.
Imagine a bunch of seventeen-year-old nerds, living among like-minded individuals for the first time in their lives. Romantic relationships were suddenly a glorious possibility, and we reveled in the chance to (*looks around furtively, giggles, pushes glasses further up her nose*) date. Most of these dating arrangements were made awkwardly (of course) and with great ceremony (of course), which resulted in some of the nerdiest pick-up lines ever.

I present to you the pick-up lines a bunch of teenaged math-and-science nerds come up with when they live together in a closed environment:

Chemistry: “Are you an exothermic reaction, honey? Because you’re making me hot.”
Calculus: “I think you must be the square root of two, ‘cause I’m getting irrational around you.”
CompSci: “You’ve turned my software into hardware.”
Biology: “Skin might be your largest sensory organ, but I’ve got something even bigger.”
Physics: “It’s not the length of the vector, it’s how you apply the force.”

But the winner, the true winner of the “worst pick-up line ever” contest, goes to the Math version:

*Clears throat*

“Hey baby, wanna come back to my place and study some mathematics? We’ll add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs, and I’ll multiply.”

*snort*

I can’t even write that with a straight face. I mean, honestly. It’s horrible.
And no, it didn’t work. None of them worked. We talked a big game, but we were still nerds, and too busy laughing at ourselves.


Brothers of Bairds Cove: Renegade

Smuggling gave him the revenge he needed....
To no one's surprise, McKee Baird never fought in the War Between the States. His fiercely independent nature made it impossible for him to take orders, and his close friendship with a black man stopped him from fighting for his father's South. But he's found his own way to rebel against the new government the United States has imposed on him... and right now, the only thing standing in the way of his smuggling business is the intriguingly uninhibited Becks Middleton.

Their chance meeting gave her the excitement she'd been craving...
Becks has a life of freedom away from Charleston society's rules. So of course she can't help but be drawn to the stimulating renegade her mother invites to visit Beckett Plantation, even if she doesn't approve of his profession. When the opportunity to seduce Mac arises, Becks takes that chance, planning on one night of passion before the dangerous smuggler leaves. But when she accidentally becomes part of his schemes, she can't reveal the truth without risking his freedom. Joining him on his ship, Becks will face not just her growing love for Mac but a confrontation with authorities that will threaten their very lives.

Can the two of them reconcile their differences before their future is stolen away?

Hey there!

This blog is dedicated to every wannabe smooth-talker.

My name is Jodi Linton. I’m the author of the Deputy Laney Briggs Series and my upcoming The Original Sinners Motorcycle Club Series with Entangled Publishing.
I’ve lived in Texas my entire life. And no, I’m not married to a ‘real’ cowboy. But I do share my suburbia home with a teacher who has a hobby moonlighting as a drummer.

Today I want to talk about horrible pick-up lines. You know, the ones that make you cringe with their seediness.  I’ve weathered my fair share of creepy one-liners, and while I’m like, “Get the hell away from me!” at the time, they can be quite hilarious in retrospect.

So when it came to needing a line for this blog post, I asked a fellow author friend about the worst pick-up line ever used on her, and hers beat any of mine hands down.  Her lovely boyfriend shot off this heart-stopper when they first met: “Hey, baby. You got five minutes to regret?”  I’ve gotta say it is pretty good, and yeah, maybe back in the day when my husband was trying every play in the book to snag a date with me this one would’ve made me laugh. And it probably would have made me say, “Buy me a drink, and then we’ll see about the next five minutes.”

Tell me. What’s some of your favorite worst pick-up lines ever?

Bye for now, y’all,

Jodi Linton


Pretty Lawless Blurb

She's about to go vigilante on his ass...

Laney Briggs was almost certain that her sexy-assed Texas Ranger, Gunner Wilson, was gonna pop the question. Instead, he went and pulled one helluva fast one—he arrested her best friend, Luke Wagner and skipped out. Now Pistol Rock's firecracker deputy is ready to go Wild West on Gunner...if she can just keep that raw, sexual chemistry under control.

Gunner was planning to propose, and it all went to hell. Now he's boots-deep into an investigation with ties to the Dirty Southern Mafia and corrupt cops. Yep, Laney is definitely gonna have his hide. Especially when she finds out just how much he's been keeping from her...

But Laney has a weakness for Gunner's delectable cowboy hotness. And for him, she will break every rule in the book—including the ones she's sworn to uphold.


a Rafflecopter giveaway

As I’m sure a lot of you know, the most recent trend in online dating is an app called Tinder. A few months ago, a friend convinced me to give it a try. I did – because why not? It’s free, and since technology is such a big part of our lives in this day and age, online dating has lost a lot of the stigma that it had a few years ago.

For those of you who haven’t heard anything about Tinder, here’s a brief summary about how it works:

- You make a brief profile with 1-5 pictures and a few lines about yourself.
- It’s connected to Facebook, which creates trust that the people you’re talking to are real.
- If you think a person is hot, you swipe right on their picture. If they’re not your type, you swipe left.
- A chat box will be available only if both people have swiped right to each other. (This way, you’re not bombarded with messages from people who aren’t your type.)

Once the chat box is available, both people are mutually attracted to each other! Yay! Now … it’s time for the inevitable pick up line. I have gotten a lot of terrible ones. So I hope you enjoy this collection of terrible pick up lines (and my responses) that I received on Tinder!




For the record, I’m not on Tinder right now. Occasionally (once every few weeks), I’ll go on the app hoping for a miracle, but I give up after a few hours, when I receive an onslaught of cheesy pickup lines and am reminded about why I stopped using the app in the first place.


DIAMONDS IN THE ROUGH

All-access doesn't mean no problems.

The three Diamond sisters survived the summer in style after coming to live with their long-lost billionaire father. But making a place for themselves at their exclusive new Las Vegas private school is throwing them any number of gold-plated curves. Savannah's YouTube stardom turns into a Sweet Sixteen reality show extravaganza—with complimentary enemies on the side.

Dangerous flirtations don't keep Peyton from a gamble that will risk far more than she planned to bet. And when Courtney and the sisters' archenemy, Madison, uncover two explosive secrets, it will rock even this town of glittering illusion—and turn their lives upside down all over again.

Sisterhood, first crushes, and scandalous secrets explode in book two of Michelle Madow's riveting series, The Secret Diamond Sisters.


a Rafflecopter giveaway

Hello! I’m here today with Sable and Ana from Ashwood Falls. We’re talking about pickup lines.

Lia: Thank you for chatting with me.
Sable: Our pleasure.
Ana: It’s always nice talking with you.

Lia: So our topic today is pick up lines. Do shifters use them?
Sable: * rolls eyes * Yes, I’m afraid so.
Ana: But it’s different with age. The teens to young adults are still in the shy stage, well most of them anyway.
Sable: Yes, while the adult males are all “I’m your mate, accept it” * she spoke in a deep, mocking tone *

Lia: * laughs * What are of the funniest or craziest ones you’ve heard?
Ana: Oh I have one. A young wolf, who was trying to get out of trouble by flirting with me, had said, “You make my wolf purr. How about a little bite?”
Sable: * laughed so hard she nearly fell out of her chair. * That was lame. Let me guess,it was Cody?
Ana: Yes. * she frowns * I miss that pain in the ass.
Sable: * takes her hand * He’s in a place as is all the children from Onxy. That is the ones I could save.

Lia: What the adult males? Are any smarter when it comes to dating?
Sable: Nope. They’re clueless. I heard a couple of bad ones. “Baby, I’d like be the cream you lap up on all fours.” and “You and I go together like a wolf and his bone.”
Ana: Oh man, those are awful. Why don’t males just straight out ask for a date instead of trying to impress us with their bad choice of pick up lines?

Lia: I don’t know. But if they didn’t use them, then we would have as much stuff to pick on them about.
Sable and Ana together: So true.

Lia: It was great talking with you. We’ll have to do it again soon.
Ana: Yes, we do.
Sable: Your welcome.

Just for fun, make up your own shifter pickup lines and post them in the comments. I hope everyone has a wonderful summer!

Hugs,

Lia

Title: Jaguar’s Judgment
Author: Lia Davis
Genre: Paranormal Romance


Sable Darwin has run from her destiny for too long. Stepping away from her role as Beta of the Onyx Pack, she chooses to take her chances and face judgment for her crimes. Her only hope for survival is to trust the male who ripped her heart out and turned his back on her so many years before.

Jared Nickels’ only loyalty is to the Alphas of Ashwood Falls. When he sees Sable again after fifteen years, he can’t stop himself from touching her. Through his Justice gift to see others’ pasts, he learns she’s not as guilty as he’d assumed. She’s actually one of the biggest victims in the war that her parents started.

When the war shifts in favor of the enemy, Sable and Jared must band together to put an end to the threat. Or die trying.

Missed connections and might-have-beens are great romance novel fodder. Summer romances and flings? Even better! Let me tell you about one of the best pick-up lines I have ever had the good fortune to receive.

The summer of 1995 was a scorcher. Temperatures in the mid-to-upper 90s and high humidity. So, naturally, I elected to spend the hottest two weeks of it at a campground in Pennsylvania, wearing layers of medieval garb.

Every August, the Society for Creative Anachronism (SCA), a medieval recreation group, hosts a mock tournament and war called the Pennsic War. 1995 was the first, and alas only, year I was able to attend. In addition to battles and all other things medieval and military, there are medieval arts and crafts (my favorites were music and dance) and lots of partying.

The year I was there, there were also—and this is the important part—two swimming areas. One was designated the family swimming hole, the other, the classic swimming hole. I’m not sure why it was a classic, but I do know this: it was clothing-optional.

Did I mention it was hot that year? And that I was in layers of heavy cotton and linen? Being young and impetuous, when my friends said they were going swimming at the classic swimming hole, I decided to go along. It took all my courage to shuck my skirt and my bodice and my chemise and my underwear and go wading into the water. Which felt, by the way, like absolute heaven.

So there I was, in water up to my shoulders, when up walks (swims?) an absolutely gorgeous man. Green eyes, curly brown hair, nice smile. We started chatting (okay, I was flirting), and he suddenly says, “You have the most amazing blue eyes.”

As is my usual MO when someone I’m flirting with starts flirting back, I panicked. To this day I don’t know how I managed to keep from ducking under the water and running away.

He said his name was Taran, and he was from (alas again) Seattle. We promised to meet up later that night for dancing at the barn. As he was leaving, one of my friends leaned over and said, “You’re standing naked in front of him, and he compliments your eyes. Now that’s a gentleman!”

Even better, when we found each other at dancing that night, the first thing he blurted was, “You look different with your clothes on!” (And he was, to my delight, a fantastic dance partner.)

Well, with him in Seattle and me in Michigan, it could never be anything more than a Pennsic flirtation. We promised to email, but neither of us really did. That was twenty years ago now (!), and I’ve never forgotten him. In these days of Facebook, you’d think I’d try to look him up, but for one thing: SCA members commonly have a medieval name they go by rather than their modern real names. I never learned Taran’s real name, and he never learned mine. My own real-life missed connection.


In my upcoming book, As Lost As I Get, itinerant doctor Zoe Rodriguez and CIA operative Lee Wheeler have a very different sort of missed connection. They meet when he’s sent in to rescue her from kidnappers in Mexico, and there’s no time for romance. After spending two years apart thinking of each other, they get a second chance in a remote corner of Colombia. Of course, second chances are never simple, especially not when both of them have jobs that put them in the center of danger.

Despite the danger, they find the time to reconnect. And thanks to the heat, they manage to find time for a little skinny-dipping of their own.

I had a blast writing their story—I hope you’ll enjoy it. And Taran: if you’re out there reading this, Facebook me!

Hello!
I’m Patty Blount, author of young adult and contemporary romance novels. But I also have a fulltime job in IT in addition to my writing career. IT stands for Information Technology. It used to be the computer department, but as technology advanced, so did the term. My job is to write the instruction
guides people need in order to correctly use their computer systems. I’ve been doing this work for about twenty years now, so in a very real sense, I’ve watched the industry grow up.

When I was just starting out, Windows hadn’t been born yet and the internet was still reserved for government or scientific use. It was also a man’s world – still is, to a large extent – but most of these guys were Big Bang Theory characters and not exactly the stuff of romance novels.

Until now.

In A Match Made at Christmas, my first contemporary romance, I thought it would be cool to make geekiness a hot and heroic character trait, so I gave my heroine my day job and made the hero an executive in the same field. Here is a passage from the story based on actual pickup lines once used on me. In this scene, hero Lucas is quite attracted to heroine Elena, but trying to play it cool. Except his friends, Al and Debbie, won’t leave him alone.


       "Oh, you're in IT, too?" Al's grin got wide and just a little bit wicked. "Luke's head of development at Burke & Kirk. Lucas, you have to try out some of those software developer pick-up lines on someone who gets them."

       "No."

       Elena's lips twitched and she groaned just for form. Inside, she was grateful for the change of subject. "Okay. Gimme one. Let's see what you got."

       "No."

       "Come on, Luke! Don't be such a dick." Al elbowed him.

       "No. And don't call me a dick."

       "Please? I want to hear these, too." Debbie patted the table between them.

       "Okay, okay. You asked for it." Luke rubbed his hands together and gave Elena a smoldering look, dropped his voice down an octave. "I hope you're broadband, baby, because I really want high-speed access." He wiggled his eyebrows.

       Elena rolled her eyes. "That's terrible."

       "Yeah, man, that was awful," Al agreed.


       "I warned you."

       "Come on, do another one," Debbie said.

       Elena put out a hand. "Please don't use the obvious puns on RAM or motherboards."

       Lucas looked at her sideways. "Please. This isn't my first program."

       She snorted and let him continue. Luke took her hand and leaned in real close. "Baby, you overclock my processor but trust me, there's no part of my body that's micro or soft." He delivered the final words with his eyes locked on hers.

       Elena stared into his dark eyes and felt herself melting, weakening, and might have leaned over the table to fuse her mouth to his…


What do you think? Is this a hot geek? I will admit these lines made me giggle but, no – they did
not work on me!

The sequel to A Match Made at Christmas was released on June 30th. It’s called His Touch and is about Elena’s sister, Kara, and her second chance at love.

I also have a new young adult novel coming out in August called NOTHING LEFT TO BURN. It’s about a boy named Reece who joins the fire department’s junior squad to win his father’s respect.
Pre-order today.

Once upon a time, there was a Canadian girl who lived in London. One fine summer day, she put on her riding leathers and hopped on the back of her boyfriend’s motorcycle and they took a drive through the city to a quaint pub in the East End of London. While her boyfriend tended to the motorcycle, she went into the pub to buy a couple of pints.

The pub was unlike anything the Canadian girl had ever seen. Dark and dank, with a low ceiling, crooked floors, dark wooden beams, a roaring fire in a massive stone fireplace and a worn, polished bar at least fifteen feet long. A lazy hound with gastric problems lay on a braided rug in the middle of the pub, adding a distinctive aroma to the already pungent scent of yeast and stale beer.

Several grizzled old men played cards at a table in one corner. An elderly couple dozed in front of the fire. And a group of guys sat at the bar chatting up the female bartender who sported multiple facial piercings and two full sleeves of tattoos.

The Canadian girl slid onto the last seat at the bar and asked the bartender for a pint. Almost immediately, one of the guys broke away from the group. Tall and broad, with a chiselled jaw, shaved head and a pillowy abdomen, he approached her with slow, measured steps. His piercing blue eyes slid over her leather-clad body like a soft caress, lingering over the swell of her breasts crushed beneath her tight leather jacket. He leaned into her, his voice low and husky.

“Ya're so Peas in a Pot I could Tu'penny Post me meat on ya, Basin Of Gravy.”

Very eloquently, and in her best Canadian, she said, “Eh?’

With a sympathetic smile, he drew closer, his fetid breath a whisper in her ear. “You don’t have any Cockney in ya, luv?”

“No.”

“Do you want some?”

“Sorry,” she said, inwardly cringing at the worst pick-up line ever. “I only ride Canadian.”


My latest release is Beyond the Cut, the second standalone book in the Sinner’s Tribe Motorcycle Club series. It was inspired by my motorcycle adventures across Europe, and it’s got all the hard riding, fierce loving, outlaw bikers you could want, plus a feisty heroine, a villainous villain and two little kids who can melt an outlaw hero’s heart.




Cade is an outlaw biker with allegiance to one thing and one thing only: The Sinner's Tribe Motorcycle Club. But when it comes to the stunningly sexy, fiercely independent Dawn Delgado, Cade finds himself...hungrier for more. Trouble is on Dawn's heels and he wants to be the answer to her prayers, whether she wants him to be or not. What can't be denied is the red-hot attraction between them. However, as they fall deeper, the danger rises and Cade may have to sacrifice it all...





New York Times and USA Today Bestselling author, Sarah Castille, worked and traveled abroad before trading her briefcase and stilettos for a handful of magic beans and a home near the Canadian Rockies. She writes erotic contemporary romance and romantic suspense featuring blazingly hot alpha heroes and the women who tame them.